Savin' Me
by xander1girl
Summary: Neela dreams a bizzare tale of what her heart truly wants.


**Savin' Me**

What had I done? This was the most horrible thing I could ever imagine I would do, actually no; I wouldn't have ever thought myself to do something this terrible…so why had I? I try to pull myself up, crawling upwards from the tiny ledge, the only thing keeping me from plunging to my death, reaching for something, anything to stop me from making this incredible fall. I can hear people talking but I find myself unable to make a sound, to tell them where I am. I try to reach my arms up higher, hoping someone would see them and come to my rescue, but did I even deserve it?

I look around franticly desperately trying to regain some kind of voice to cry out to the people on the roof, tears falling from my eyes now, tears for what I have done, and for the fear of what was to happen to me. I was still young, I had lots of time to fix what I had done, and I couldn't die like this. My voice returns unexpectedly, and I call out without even thinking, the name I call sending a shockwave through my entire body.

"Ray…Ray help me!" I call

I can hear the people on the roof's voices fill with confusion, and could I see them, they were probably looking around to see where the voice had come from.

"Ray." I call again "Ray please…"

I hear footsteps approach me, and three people poke their heads over the ledge, eyes widening as they see my tragic predicament. Ray, Abby and Michael are standing there now, looking shocked and scared. The boys reach to grab my hands, but as they touch me, I slip and nearly fall. All three of them back away slightly.

"I'll go get some help…" Abby stammers, backing away and then I believe running for the door that led back into the hospital.

"Neela…how did you get like this?" Michael asks, "Did someone push you?"

Ray shakes his head. He knew how I got here, and I was surprised he wanted to help me after all I have done.

"She did this to herself Michael. Just like she always does."

Michael frowns and turns to Ray "What are you trying to say?"

"She knows what I mean, why don't you ask her?"

Both the men look to me and I am unable to speak once more

"Mi…Michael…R…Ray please…I can't now I can't…" I stammer out finally

"Tell him Neela, he deserves that much." Ray demands, hitting me with an icy stare

I swallow and look to Michael now, the confusion and hurt in his eyes made my heart ache, but Ray was right, Michael deserved to know.

"Michael…I can't be with you…I…I have feelings…for Ray. I know I shouldn't and I know its wrong…" I spit out

"You slept with him?" came the cold hurt response

"Yes…" I answer quietly, glancing down at the busy city below

"You love him?" he asks

I am unable to look him in the eye as I answer this one, my heart aching hating to have to hurt him like this. "Yes…"

"That's all you had to say Neela…I just want you to be happy." He responds, kneeling down to kiss the top of my head before getting up and walking away.

Ray kneels down now and offers me a smile "See, that wasn't so hard, was it?" he asks taking my hands gently, this time I didn't slip.

"Ray..." I squeak out "It's not worth it, not for me, not after everything I've done…it's not worth saving me."

"Neela…" he starts "I love you, and now that you finally admitted it, I will always be there to save you, no matter what you've done…"

"Ray I…" I am unable to finish, as Abby, Morris and a few others rush over, Morris trips and falls into Ray, knocking him over the edge.

"RAY!" I scream as he falls, letting go of me, I fall with him….

I wake up with a start, sitting up straight in my bed, a name slipping from my lips before I can stop it. "RAY!"

I hear footsteps from the other bedroom running towards mine. The door is flung open and Ray stand there, in only his boxer shorts looking worried.

"Neela what is it? Is someone trying to break in? Are you alright?" He makes his way over to my bed looking around nervously.

I close my eyes and swallow, shaking my head at him "No I just…had a bad dream is all…"

A grin appears on his face "You were dreamin' of me?"

I open my eyes and frown at him; he laughs and shakes his head before turning and heading back to the door.

"Ray wait…"

He turns to face me once more

"I have to talk to you about something…it's important…"

This was my chance; this was how I would make amends for all I've done to him….


End file.
